I first met Mac Belt in late October 1960. He was a counselor with the Big Brothers in Toronto and he worked out of a grand old
mansion on Jarvis Street. My appointment had been arranged by the Salvation
Army. I had spent my first night away from home at the men’s shelter on
Sherbourne and Queen Streets after a couple who owned a small convenience store
gave me a bus ticket and a twenty-five cent coin when I showed up in their
store in suburban Toronto asking for work. Not knowing what else to do when I found
myself homeless in a strange city at 14, I had gone to small businesses along
the street, asking if they had any work for me. My inspiration for that was the
novels by Horatio Alger I had read a few years before. You know, honest orphan
acts responsibly and is adopted by an older single millionaire who recognizes
his innate goodness. When I arrived at the shelter, lining up behind the other
men awaiting my turn, I listened to what each said to the man in the cage.
They’d exchange few words, a coin would slide across the counter, a ticket
would be returned, and then a loud buzzer would sound so the man could open a
door beside the custodian’s cage.
When my turn came I slid my quarter across the counter and
said, in imitation of the men before me, “Bed and breakfast.” Instead of
automatically issuing me a meal ticket the man looked closely at me and asked,
“How old are you?” “Seventeen,” I answered bravely. “What’s your name?” I had
already thought of that. At home I had been called Jim, though my first given
name was Ronald. I knew it best to stick to a name close to my own so I’d have
no trouble remembering it. “Ron White.” He slid a sheet of paper and a pencil
across the counter and asked me to write out my full name. So I wrote, “Ronald
James White.” He took the paper then gave me the pink ticket. “You’ll be in the
Snake Pit tonight. Down the stairs and to your right. Be careful. Sleep with
your jacket on and keep your shoes under your pillow.” The buzzer sounded.
I did not sleep well in the room filled with a half dozen
silent men on steel-framed single beds and was embarrassed by the dirt my shoes
left on the sheet. Breakfast was porridge and toast with watery tea, milk and
sugar already added, served in a dining hall filled with men intent on scraping
up every bit of their gruel. As I was leaving with no plans of what to do next a
teenager offered me a cigarette and asked me how old I was. When I said,
“Seventeen” he said, “Me too.” He then
explained to me how to get to the Salvation Army’s Social Services Centre and said
I should tell them a good story and they’d give me some more meal tickets. I
wandered westwards along Queen Street in the bright cold sunshine, marvelling
at the amazing height of the skyscrapers that came into view as I approached
Yonge Street. I estimated that some of them were more than 10 stories high,
maybe as much as 15. North along Yonge Street, past stores I knew from their
commercials (“People’s Credit Jewelers” whose jingle I could not get out of my
head). A short block east on College Street and I arrived at the Salvation Army
Social Services Centre and waited my turn on a wooden chair, marvelling at a
box filled with eyeglasses with a sign inviting everyone to help themselves or
to donate. I could not imagine wearing eye glasses previously worn by someone
else.
A man in a Salvation Army uniform invited me to his office,
took down my information (all of it false) and then asked what he could do for
me. I hadn’t thought ahead that far and blurted the first thing that popped into
my head. “I want to go to school.” That, apparently, was the right answer. He
asked me to wait in the waiting area. Ten minutes later he called me back and
told me to go back to the Men’s Hostel and ask to see the Major.
Back at the Sally Ann, as I was learning to call it, the man
in the front cage directed me to a different door, this one not requiring a
buzzer. The Major was a steel-grey-haired gentleman in full dress uniform who
told me that I could work in the kitchen in exchange for room and board while
they worked things out. He also told me that there were regular worship
services that I was expected to attend. I had an appointment at the Big Brothers
in a few days; the man in the cage out front would supply me with streetcar
tickets and instructions. He directed an employee, in street clothes, to take
me to the kitchen to meet the head cook and then show me the cubicle where I’d
be staying. It was a large industrial kitchen with massive machines. It was
quiet at that time of day and the few men dressed in whites and aprons looked
at me curiously as the head cook explained that I’d be working from 6 am until
1 pm, and then from 3 pm until 6 or so. Someone would wake me in the morning.
“And don’t give me any grey hairs!” he admonished me. My cubicle was a
tin-enclosed area, open at the top of the six foot high walls, and against a
brick outer wall. There was a window that looked out on another brick wall
about two feet away. I had a single bed, a cot really, a small wardrobe, and
small dresser. I was given a toothbrush, comb, and a few pairs of underwear and
socks neatly folded.
In the morning I was directed to dress in white pants, shirt,
and a white apron, all of which hung on hooks in a small dressing room beside
the kitchen. Half a dozen men worked in the kitchen, all intent on their tasks.
I was given the job of clarifying butter, a completely new process to me. As
cubes of butter melted in a sauce pan I had to scoop out the curds as they
formed and floated to the top of the liquid. I was then shown how to operate
the toaster, a contraption on which one placed the bread on a moving tractor
feed that hauled the bread up and around a heating element. The toast would
then fall out of the bottom of the machine. I had to swipe each piece of toast
with a paint brush that I dipped into the clarified butter. The entire
procedure was foreign to me, but I marvelled at the technical ingenuity of it,
even down to using a paint brush to spread butter.
The men to be fed lined up single file, took a tray from a
stack, and pushed it along a narrow counter that separated the kitchen from the
dining area. An employee would dollop a ladle of porridge into bowls and the
client would select one then place it on his tray; the man would move to the
next station where he’d receive two pieces of toast that I had painted with
clarified butter. Tea was served from a large caldron with sugar and milk
already mixed in, ladled into cups. They’d shuffle off to long tables, most
eating quickly with their faces close to their bowls. When finished they’d
bring their trays with used dishes and utensils to a window where I was
assigned to collect them, scraping the remainders into a large garbage can that
I was told would be sold to famers as pig slop and stacking items into trays
prepared for the automatic dishwasher. I’d shove trays as they filled into the
maw of the dishwasher and then sort and stack items as they emerged at the
other end. I learned that cutlery fresh from an industrial dishwasher is hot
enough to burn.
When all the men had finished and shuffled off to hang
around before the mission, smoking and gossiping, before starting their daily
routines, I had to wipe down the tables, stack the chairs on the tables, and
then mop the floor. It was time to start the preparations for lunch. After
lunch (usually soup and sandwiches) had been served, I’d again clean the dining
hall, finish sorting and stacking dishes and cutlery, then mop the entire
kitchen floor. Dinner would already be slow cooking in the massively-sized
caldrons, and I’d achingly return to my cubicle for my two-hour break. Back to
work for the supper shift and then final cleanup of everything, leaving the
kitchen and dining room sparkling clean awaiting the next day’s repetition. My
first evening the youngest member of the staff, a chubby young man in his
twenties invited me to his room. It was not much bigger than mine, but at least
it had regular walls. He let me chose a tie from his collection and gave me
that day’s Toronto Star so I’d have something to read before going to
sleep.
So, there I was. I had left home only 48 hours before and I
had already a room of my own and had put in a long day’s work.
Next day I did it all again. My main tasks were the simple
menial jobs that had to be done, like feeding the dishwasher, mopping the
floors, minding the toaster, scrapping dirty dishes into the slop pail. But I
did it all without complaint. My fellow workers pretty much kept to themselves.
They were friendly enough, but distant. The head cook was in his mid-thirties
and talked in a loud commanding voice. He gave orders curtly, fully confident
in what he was doing. He called me “The Kid,” and so that’s what the others
called me. I didn’t mind. He’d order someone, “Joe, show The Kid how to clean
the meat slicer and don’t let him cut his fingers off.” “You!” he’d shout at
me, “Do it right the first time—and don’t give me any grey hairs!” The order
regarding the grey hairs was one I’d hear several times a shift.
Thursday was my appointment at the Big Brothers and I had to
leave the lunch shift early. All the other staff members seemed to know about
my appointment and wished me luck. The man who had given me the tie suggested
that I wear it and so I did. The Big Brother offices were in a Jarvis Street
Victorian mansion converted into offices. A large stone staircase led up to the
main door, heavy oak with leaded stained glass for windows. A Dutch door, the
top half open, marked off the receptionist’s area. Mac Belt’s office was on the
second floor, up a long curving open staircase. He was waiting for me at the
top of the stairs. “Well, Ronnie White, welcome!” he beamed, hand out for a
handshake. “Right this way.” He led me into his office. It could have been a
sitting room at one time. It was very large, his desk before a large bay window
had two chairs before it. “Have a seat,” he indicated, and asked if I had had any
trouble finding the place while he circled his desk and sat in his office
chair.
He was a short man with thin white-hair and a rotund belly. He
offered me a cigarette and we both lit up. He pulled out a writing pad and took
down my particulars. Name, age, where I was from, how I wound up homeless. I
had chosen 17 as my age, knowing that if anyone knew my real age, I’d likely be
hauled off to a police station and packed off home. Seventeen seemed old enough
to be on one’s own, yet not too old as I knew I’d never be able to convince
anyone I was older than that. I thought it unlikely I’d be able to convince
them I was 17, but it wasn’t so far from the truth as to be totally
unbelievable. My story was I was orphaned. I had been living with an aunt and
uncle in Sarnia who had recently died. Again, fact interwoven with fiction. I
did have an aunt and uncle in Sarnia, but they were very much alive. I knew
enough about Sarnia’s streets and general layout to be able to create an
illusion that I knew the city well. When he asked what school I had attended, I
didn’t hesitate to name “Sarnia Collegiate.” I didn’t know if there was
actually a school by that name, but cities tended to name their schools after
themselves.
Preliminaries out of the way he asked how I was making out
at the Sally Ann and if they were treating me well. I didn’t know what “well”
meant in that context, so I shrugged. He asked about my work there, how I got
along with the other men. He seemed satisfied with my one-word “Okay” replies.
Did I have enough clothing? I explained that they had given me a few basic
items. He asked where I got the tie and I told him that one of the men who
worked in the kitchen gave it to me. He asked me if the man had asked for
anything in return. I was surprised because I thought that Mr. Belt understood
that I had nothing to give in return. I never realized until I was writing this
that Mr. Belt had a way of asking about sexual exploitation in such a way that
I never realized that that was what he was asking about. If he had have been more explicit I likely
would have refused to answer. Even if the man who gave me the necktie had
wanted anything in return, it was too subtly expressed for me to pick up. In
any case, I simply could not talk about anything remotely related to sex with
an adult; it was unthinkable to me. Sexual interest was something hidden and
shared only through hints, bad jokes, and suggestions with peers.
He then got up and laid out a table-top hockey game, with
push-pull rods to control the players, on his desk and challenged me to a game.
He won easily. We played a few games, always with the same result. He did that
for my first few visits and then switched to checkers. He continued to
challenge me to a game of checkers every time I met him over the next several
years and I don’t recall ever having won a single game against him. Also, at
the end of every meeting with him he gave me two street-car tickets. One to get
home on and one for the next visit. We made an appointment for a week from my
first meeting. He gave me a cigarette “for the road” and shook my hand as we
parted.
* * *
That evening after the dinner shift was over all the men who
worked in the kitchen, except for the head chef, filed into a room next to the
dining room that was set up as a chapel. The folding chairs filled up with
“customers” as the men who relied on the Salvation Army mission were often
referred to. A woman in a Salvation Army uniform sat in a bench before the
upright piano and the Major led the service. We sang hymns like “The Old Rugged
Cross” and “Amazing Grace” while the woman pounded out the chords with a
military meter. The Major read a few short passages from the Bible, mainly from
the “Gospel of John” and “Revelations.” The men in attendance were encouraged
to testify. One especially decrepit-looking man stood to announce that he had
fallen into a gutter, so drunk he could not stand, when an angel from heaven
came down and “lifted him up.” The Major and the pianist muttered “Halleluiah.
Praise the Lord!” and the congregation rumbled something in reply. After
service the men filed into the dining room where cups of pre-sweetened tea and
a small slice of carrot cake was served to each of them.
Friday, I was told, was pay day. After the lunch shift the
kitchen workers lined up in the dining room waiting their turn with the paymaster
who was seated at a small table. He had a leger book and envelopes with each
man’s name on them. Each man was solemnly handed his envelope and I could see
that each contained cash that the employee would quickly count before heading
off to the street or to his room. The paymaster looked surprised when I stood
before his desk and told me he was sorry, but he had nothing for me. “But I
work here,” I protested. There was nothing he could do, he told me. Later that
day I was told that the Major wanted to see me. I sat across from his desk.
“I thought you understood,” he told me. “We are providing
you with room and board.”
“But I work like everybody else,” I told him. “I don’t have
any money.”
He reflected for a moment then said that he would give me a
dollar a day in addition to my room and board. That seemed reasonable to me and
I agreed. He took four dollars from his wallet and handed it to me as my pay
for the four days I had worked so far. From then on, each Friday the pay master
had an envelope for me containing seven dollars, one for each day I had worked
that week. As I recall I was not docked pay for missing work due to
appointments with Mr. Belt or other authorized absences.
Other than cigarettes which, in those days, cost about
twenty-five cents a pack (the same as the cost of a bed for the night and
breakfast at the Sally Ann), I had no need of any money. There was a small used
book store on the other side of Queen Street where I would buy copies of The Toronto Star. I also bought used
comic books for five cents each, sometimes two for a nickel. So, the money
began to accumulate in my pocket. The kitchen workers warned me that the women
who loitered in front of the book store were prostitutes and that I should stay
away from them. None of them bothered me, as I was just another kid in their
eyes. In any case, I would have had no idea what to do with such a woman even
if I did have enough money to purchase their services.
* * *
On Monday I was called to the Major’s office after the
breakfast and lunch shift was over. He told me that he had been pleased to see
me at the evening service and asked me how I was getting along. I told him that
everything was fine. He then told me that he had a special job for me. There
was a woman staying at the Royal York Hotel who needed a man to carry her
display cases for her whole she went on sales calls. Was I interested? I
shrugged my consent, curious. I had to be clean and polite. Could I manage it?
Sure. He told me to be cleaned up, dressed in a tie, at 11:00 am next morning
and the man in the front cage would give me directions.
“What about my work in the kitchen?” I asked.
“Work the breakfast shift until 10:30, then get ready. You
can go back to the kitchen when you get back.”
Of course my fellow workers already knew all the details
when I returned to the kitchen, teasing me about working for a woman at the
Royal York, hinting that I’d be doing more than carrying her cases. The Royal
York was the ritziest and most expensive hotel in Toronto and a visit to its
august premises was something far beyond the dreams of the kitchen
workers. Next morning, after I had
combed my hair and knotted the tie about my neck, the man at the front desk
gave me two streetcar tickets and told me how to get to the Royal York. He
warned me to be polite and respectful.
The opulence of the Royal York was overwhelming. I politely
inquired after the woman I was told to meet at the front desk and stood
awkwardly to the side until a stunningly beautiful woman emerged from an
elevator and approached me, hand outstretched. “You must be from the Salvation
Army,” she said, shaking my hand. “I am pleased to meet with you. And you are
called?” I told her my name. An almost gentle exotic perfume enveloped her. She
was dressed in a skirted business suit, a white blouse with some lace work at
the front, and highly polished black high heeled shoes. She had a soft French
accent. “You will do,” she said after looking me over. “Come with me.” And she
led me back to the elevator. We rode to her floor in silence. Once in her room,
I stood awkwardly while she gestured at two small suitcases. “I will require of
you to carry these for me. Can you manage this?” I agreed that I could. “Bon.
Let us go then,” she said. I picked up the two cases and followed from her room
back down to the lobby and out to the street before the hotel where a taxi was
waiting for us.
I kept one case at my feet, the other on my lap. She
explained as we rode that she was from Montreal and represented a watch
company. Our first stop was the People’s Credit Jewelers store on Yonge Street.
I carried her cases to a small office at the back of the store, and then sat in
a chair just outside the office and waited while she conducted her business
behind the closed door. Half an hour
later she emerged, I jumped to my feet and retrieved the cases from the office
while she chatted with the manager. Another short taxi ride to another jeweler
further north along Yonge. As I waited outside the manager’s office this time,
I fell asleep, then came to with a start. A large clock on the wall showed it was
3:30. I jumped to my feet, assuming I had slept the entire afternoon and
evening away. In a panic, I rushed out to the street, wondering why she had
left me there and why there were so many people on the sidewalk in the wee
hours of the morning. My head finally cleared and I realized that it was
actually late afternoon. I returned to my chair and waited.
When she completed her business, we took a taxi back to the
Royal York Hotel. As I followed her through the lobby I felt dirty and out of
place. Though I had been at the Salvation Army Hostel for only a week I felt as
though I had become one of the grubby and shabbily dressed men. Once in her
room she opened her purse and took out a five dollar bill, holding it out to
me. “You have done a good job for me,” she said and then sat while I stood
unsure of myself.
“So tell me,” she asked. “You look like a nice boy. Why are
you resting at the Salvation Army?”
Her use of the verb “rest” momentarily confused me, but I
understood the intent of the question. I told her my story of being orphaned
and then my aunt and uncle dying. I was now on my own.
“So, have you the plans?” she asked.
“The Salvation Army is working on getting me back to school.
The Big Brothers are helping,” I explained.
“Ah, bon. That is good. You must go at the school.”
She then told me she was returning the following week and
asked if I would be available to help her again. I assured her that I would be.
* * *
Back
in the kitchen the men asked about my date, implying that I did more than carry
the woman’s cases. I was embarrassed. There was a man I hadn’t met before
working that dinner shift. His name was David. He was, perhaps, in his early
sixties, a soft-looking and apparently gentle man. He had lost his thumb in the
meat slicer the day before I had started work and this was his first day back,
a large bandage where his thumb used to be. He was shy, but friendly, and told
me he was having trouble rolling cigarettes, could I help him out? After work,
we went back to his room, which was a little larger and better furnished than
the young man’s room I had been in the day I started. He showed me his
cigarette rolling machine. I’d lay a twelve inch long cigarette paper the
length of it, fill it with tobacco, lick the adhesive and then roll the paper
and tobacco through the machine which produced an even tube. There were slots
in the machine marking where I could use a razor blade to cut the super cigarette
to produce three king-sized cigarettes or four regular-sized ones. I rolled
enough cigarettes for David to be able to fill an empty commercial package and
then rolled another half dozen for myself.
Over
the next few days I spent a lot of time with David. Each evening I’d roll a
package of cigarettes for him and he’d ask me questions about my background.
One evening he told me that when he met me it was as if he had been digging in
a mine, in the black muck, and had found a diamond. He sometimes hugged me when
he told me things like that. I stood passively while he clutched me to his
chest. Otherwise, he never touched me.
The
other men in the kitchen had never been overly-friendly with me. They were
polite, but distant, as if they sensed that I did not belong there. There was a
very fat man who kept to himself working quietly in a corner of the kitchen. I
never knew what he did and I don’t think he ever spoke to me. There was a very
thin, intense man, who did not seem to like me and kept his distance. The
chubby young man who had given me a tie the first day was more distant with me
after David returned to work. He later told me that this was deliberate on his
part, as he saw how friendly David and I had become and said he “didn’t want to
interfere.” I did not understand what he meant and didn’t ask.
* *
*
One evening after I had rolled David’s package of
cigarettes, I decided to go for a walk. Though it was early November, it was a
pleasant evening. As I stood on the sidewalk outside the Sally Ann, lighting a
cigarette while deciding which way to head, a young man said hello and asked me
my name. He was maybe in his 20’s, a bit better dressed than most of the men at
the Sally Ann, and definitely chubby—something out of place where most of the
men were raggedly thin. We started talking and he said he was going for a walk
as well, could he join me? Why not? We cut across the park across the street
from the hostel, then meandered along the streets. He pointed to a restaurant
with an awning over the front door and said something about it being a fancy
place. I thought he meant to enter it and turned, but he stopped me saying it
was far too expensive for us.
As we headed back towards to Sally Ann along Queen Street he
stopped before a restaurant and said, “Come on.” I assumed he wanted a coffee
or snack and so followed him into the restaurant. “Come on,” he beckoned,
heading towards the back of the restaurant and to a set of stairs that led
downward to the restrooms. I had no idea what was going on but I followed
obediently. A man behind the counter looked alarmed. At the bottom of the
stairs my companion turned so that he stood close to me and started
manipulating my genitals through my clothing. He had a strange glassy look in
his eyes and was breathing heavily. I was 14 and immediately responded with an
erection to his attentions, but I tried to back away. I had a very small pocket
knife that I grasped in my pocket and opened.
“Stop,” I said, as confidently as I could, starting to draw
the knife from my pocket.
He looked puzzled. “What’s wrong?” he asked. “Don’t you like
it?”
“Just stop,” I repeated.
Fortunately he stepped back and said, “I just thought you
might like it.”
I stumbled up the stairs and walked quickly through the
restaurant. Once outside I walked away from the Salvation Army as I was worried
he’d follow me. I circled around a few blocks and checked carefully to make
sure he was not in sight when I slipped back into the safety of the Sally Ann.
I said earlier that David never touched me inappropriately,
but that it not quite true. One day he had me lay on his bed next to him while
he hugged me. As usual, I lay stiffly and unresponsive as he hugged me and went
on about what a beautiful jewel I was. Suddenly he reached down and quickly
touched my genitals saying, “Has Ronnie got a hard-on?” I definitely did not
and would have been frightened if I had, but his touch was very brief and he
immediately drew his hand away. Otherwise, he sometimes hinted that he’d like
to do more than hug me but he never went any further. Looking back I can see
that he was deeply conflicted. He liked and respected me enough to keep his
desires under control, but it must have been very difficult for him. He told me
he was seeing a psychiatrist and said that the doctor had advised him not to
touch me. Remember that homosexuality was seen as an illness then and
homosexual acts were against the law. That also might have been playing a role
in David’s restraint, but I never thought of him as a “dirty old man” and he
never repelled me the way that the chubby young man had in the restaurant
restroom. Even in my naivety I saw David as a lonely person fighting a silent
battle with demons I did not understand.
***
At my next appoint with Mr. Belt my story unravelled. He had
a writing pad before him on his desk and told me that it was necessary to
contact my former school to get my records if they were going to get me back to
school. “Let’s see,” he started, “Sarnia Collegiate, I think you said. Right?”
I knew there was no point to further lying. I could not look
at him. “No,” I whispered. “I didn’t go there.”
He waited quietly while I struggled to find the right words.
I looked out the window, at the walls, at the table hockey game leaning against
a wall in the corner.
“I didn’t live in Sarnia,” I said in a strangled voice,
having to force each word.
He waited.
“I’m not 17.”
He waited.
“My parents aren’t dead.”
He waited.
“I don’t want to go home,” I said in a rush.
“No one is going to make you go home,” he said quietly.
“But I’m only 14.”
He repeated himself, “No one is going to make you go home,
Ron. That is your name, right?”
“Sort of,” I said, and then explained about how I had been
called Jim at home, but that was really my middle name.
“Do you prefer Jim or Ron?” he asked.
I paused for a moment and then, deciding that if this was a
new life I was choosing for myself, I was going to use the name I preferred.
“Ron.”
“Okay, Ron it is.”
He then proceeded to write down the correct information
about my name, school, and background, including my former address and
telephone number. He never once asked me why I had left home and in the six
years I knew him before he died he never once asked about my home life. I had
said I didn’t want to return there and that was good enough for him. That is
how I wanted it and I was grateful that Mac Belt, and the other mentors I got
to know in the coming years, respected my right to choose my life’s path.
“I hope you realize,” he said when we were finished, “that I
am going to have to contact your father. There’s the matter of school taxes to
sort out if you are going to go to school in Toronto.”
When I heard that I was going to go to school in Toronto I
felt a momentary elation. It was something that could actually happen. If
contacting my father was the price to pay, so be it. I trusted Mr Belt and the
Salvation Army major to protect me. They had made it clear that they were on my
side.
Mr. Belt then told me he was working on a plan and that he
would let me know when he had something definite to share with me. And then he
pulled out his checker board, which I learned was his way of saying that the
working part of our meeting was over and that I could relax.
***
When I returned to the Sally Ann the man in the front cage
told me that the major wanted to see me. The major, as always, was seated
behind his desk. He curtly told me to sit down and then stared at me for what
seemed a long time.
Finally he said, “Well, I hope you have learned something
about lying.”
I had no idea what I was supposed to have learned but I
agreed with him.
“Fine. Go back to the kitchen.”
Of course all the men in the kitchen already knew what had
transpired. David, especially, looked stunned.
That night in his room he kept shaking his head, “Fourteen!
Fourteen! My God.”
I was deeply embarrassed and for the next few days was wary
about possible fallout, but, when nothing happened and things fell back into
routine, I relaxed.
At my next weekly meeting with Mr Belt he showed me a letter
he had received from my father. I read through it quickly. “I will not be held
responsible for the actions of an immature child.” read one of the lines. I
gave the letter back to Mr Belt.
“What do you think?” he asked.
“He thinks I’m a child,” I complained.
He then told me that he had made arrangements with a home so
I could go back to school. He described it briefly as a home for troubled boys
in the city’s east end. Its managers, Mr and Mrs Strickland, were dedicated
people who had established the home in response to what they perceived as a
need. After studying several such institutions they had settled on a form that
they thought worked best. If interested, I had an appointment to meet them the
next day. Of course I was interested, so Mr Belt gave me some streetcar tickets
and careful instructions on how to find the Toronto Boys’ Home on Queen Street
East behind the Greenwood Community Centre. “Wear your tie and be polite,” were
his final words of advice.
***
I sat at the front of the streetcar, nervously watching the
street signs as I rode east along Queen Street. I marvelled at Parliament
Street with its gaudily painted wooden houses with curly-cue decorated
balconies. Then Sackville and Sumach Streets with more slum housing. We crossed
the Don River, bordered by decrepit buildings overlooking a foul-smelling oily
slick with dead fish floating belly-up. We passed old factories, warehouses,
railway tracks, and bars and convenience stores in crumbling brick buildings.
At Logan Avenue I disembarked and walked west past WoodGreen United Church to
Booth Street. The boys’ home was the first house on the west side of Booth. It
was an ordinary-looking two story semi-detached home with no sign or indication
that it was anything other than a working-class family home. A high fence
separated it from the WoodGreen Community Centre and its driveway was fenced
off with a high chain-link gate. Four wooden steps led up to the roofed porch
and the front door. A very short, intense man with slicked black hair greeted
me enthusiastically and invited me into his home where I was to live for the
next eighteen months.
***
The woman from the Royal York hotel sent me money orders for
twenty dollars each for the next two Christmases. She phoned once when I lived
at the Home and I took a streetcar to the Royal York where we shared a coffee
at the bar and she asked about my school life. I received a wedding invitation
from her, but I did not know what to do with it. At 15 I could hardly be
expected to go to Montreal for the weekend. Still I kept the ornate card for a
few years.
I saw David once again shortly after I started living at the
Home. He told me that he missed me, but wished me luck. He hugged me for a very
long time. I never saw anyone that I had known at the Sally Ann again.
I continued as one of Mac Belt’s clients over the years. At
first we met weekly in his office and played checkers. When I was hospitalized
he visited me weekly and worked with the Ontario government to get me a full
scholarship for Upper Canada College (which I turned down). He got me jobs over
the years and expressed disappointment when I messed up. He would sometimes
invite me to his home that he shared with his wife, for dinner and to watch the
hockey game. He showed score of a
composition I had written to a member of the Toronto Symphony Orchestra and
reported back that it was thought highly of and that I showed a lot of talent
and potential. For several months when I was 18 he met me weekly for lunch near
the Big brothers office. But once I settled down into a job that I held onto
and moved in with a girlfriend, I no longer kept in touch…and then, in June of
1967, six and a half years after I had first met him, I called the Big Brother
office to share the news with him that I had been accepted into university.
The woman who answered the phone sounded startled when I
asked for Mr Belt and passed the phone to a gentleman who asked me what my call
was about. I told him it was personal. He then said that Mr Belt had passed
away about a year before. He had always believed in me. I’ve always regretted
that he never found out that his faith had been justified.
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